Wednesday, February 19, 2014

My first bout with death

Because I have not heard a lot from people on any specific areas of my life they would like to hear about I will try to take the previous approach to my life and see how I do.

I will take the list of memories that I did one liners on and see if I can expound on a portion of that list based on conversations since I wrote the one liners and based on my memories.

Pet frog gets run over story - Oklahoma, also mice in the bed and hot sidewalks:

Since writing this one liner I have learned that these were at least two separate stories.  The pet I had in Oklahoma was a toad if I remember right to be a little more descriptive.  It had gotten away and somehow gotten into a garage type area of the house.  I am pulling this complete story from memory so hopefully I get this right.  I came out of the house looking for my pet, and saw as a door that had been leaning over against the wall had fallen onto it.  It may have already been killed by the door being on top of it.  At this time my dad drove into the garage, and I tried to stop him.  I can only assume he thought I was just excited to see him, and I imagine he was busy watching me so he didn't see the door laying on the floor.  When he pulled in he ran over the door, and my pet was no more.
I have a few questions as I think back on this:  First why is this significant in my life?  Why does this matter and technically who cares? 

Well these are my personal opinions, but I will try to explain my thoughts:

Why is it significant in my life?  I imagine it is much like the pets others have when they die there is a lot of sorrow and grief that takes place.  I was no different and as a child remember the grief.  As far as I am aware this was my first pet and I can only imagine I was pretty attached.  This was also my first real experience with death.  I believe there comes a point in each of our lives (if we live long enough) that we have to start to face and learn of death and its apparent permanency.  This begins to change as we learn of the gospel and one of the greatest comforts it brings along with it is that death is but a short period of separation and not permanent.  There have been many experiences with this since this time in my life, but I feel this was a traumatic time for me and so it stands out as a moment of growth and significance in my life.

Why does this matter?  I think I partially answered why this matters in my previous comments, but I will expound with a story.  I recently had a family I am close to that had to put down their dog after having had it in the family for many years.  The loss was a strain on the family and some of the activities they take a normal part in were cancelled to grieve for their loss.  I still feel the sting because this happened recently and my children play with their children, the impact of the loss therefore not only affected their family, but mine and my families, and others as well who offered condolences.  I also think facing these kinds of losses helps families to draw closer together and strengthens us as individuals for other losses we may face throughout life.

Who cares?  I guess that question can only be answered by those on the receiving end of this post, but I have hopes at a minimum that it will let my posterity know that this experience happened and that to me it had an impact on my life.

Hot sidewalks:  This also is a memory from Oklahoma and the memory is likely just a hot day where I was out playing and for the first time I realized that the sidewalks were literally hot enough to cook an egg.  I just thought it was a statement people make to say they were really hot, but since then have learned better.  Why does this matter?  Good question, I would have to guess it was around the same time my pet died and I somehow linked the two memories.  Suffice it to say I rarely think of the one without the other.

Mice in the bed:  Now how I got this tied into the other memories is a little more baffling.  I assume it was close to the same time in my life, but this happened in Utah, and the other experiences happened in Oklahoma.  We had a home in Utah where some of our items were stored while we lived in Oklahoma, this happened when we came back to pick up some of our things.  We found a family of mice in one of the beds.  I personally believe I like the little vermin and may have bonded with them because of the loss of my other pet.  It may sounds gross but I have always liked mice since. 

I know this is a little odd compared to many of my posts, but being as I am trying to put down memories as a child I can only piece these together somewhat like a puzzle.  The effect may be some strange posts, but the hope is twofold.  First I am hoping to capture memories I have of my youth and second I am hoping to follow the norm for this blog which is that we can overcome any trial or struggle we face, through the help of a Loving Heavenly Father.

The loss of those dear to us whether they be family or pets or friends... They can drain us physically, mentally, and even spiritually.  I share my testimony that there are those around us who care.  They may not be able to put their feelings into words any better than we can, but there is always a shoulder to turn to when times get rough.  I pray that at least one shoulder we learn to rely on be the shoulder of Jesus Christ.  It is even better if we lean on our Heavenly Father, and that of His Son Jesus Christ.  They are 2 individuals we can always turn to even when it seems no one else is available.  These two have been a support to me when I had no one else to turn to, they have helped me through some of the greatest struggles in my life, and I know if others will approach them they will do the same for all of their family here on earth.

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